Being good to myself...

A found painting, 8/21/2011...random spray painting done by my Fred, he was spray painting somethings for a project and I found his left behind marks on the plywood intriguing

 

A found painting, another view, 8/21/2011

A found painting, yet another look, 8/21/2011

Starting over, new blanks to work with...yes, that is a Pringle's potato chip can on the table, I use it to store my brushes.

 Last weekend I started to think about new work...anything that I had started prior to my mother's death, I painted over as the flow had been disrupted and I just lost heart to work on what I had put there, so, I made them all white again. I will probably add some fresh rice paper in areas where I want to freshen up the texture as now there is no longer the papery feel to the surface that I prefer to maintain under the thin washes of paint...

Oh, I've hit a rough patch...we all hit them throughout our lives, these last two years have been emotionally rough as my Fred lost both of his parents within a year of each other, and now this month of August, my mother, and in the midst of this while struggling to find equilibrium three weeks to the day of my mother's death, my poor father had an accident at home and broke his hip...accidents happen...we were just feeling a sense of "normal", feeling less apprehensive about dad being home alone as his attitude and forward thinking were making us feel confident that he was going to be okay as time went by, but now this new change, shift in gears...oh the poor thing, I feel so bad for him! The surgery went well, his hip is fixed, and now, barring any medical complications associated with the surgery, he should be moved on to the rehab unit as early as Monday and the next step, the long road to recovery.

Lovely news tho' my mother's paintings and other crafts that she entered into the New York State Fair won prizes! She rec'd 4 honorable mentions and a blue ribbon...scrolling through the photos I took at the house, I only have the one of the bunny (he's leaning up against the wooden box on the rug):

Janie's Bunny and other things she made, the bunny won honorable mention. Her traditional hooked wool rug with little chickadees won a blue ribbon (similar in style to the rug on the left with Paul Revere, only it is smaller.) She hand dyed and hand cut her wool for these rugs.

Our little gallery, Moonlighting had its closing reception last night, my Fred and I were unable to make it as we were just returning from my father's house and I am gimping around with severe sciatic nerve pain because of the disc in my lower back became irritated (apparently, I haven't been good to myself, so now I'm paying for it in spades!) It is bittersweet shutting it down, it was a good experience having a place of our own to hang our artwork, inviting people in to see what we've done, and enjoying good company...but in a way that is a little bit selfish, I'm glad we're done with it (more time to paint!) We learned a lot and it's time to move on. I feel badly that I haven't been able to be there this past month with all that has gone on, but there isn't much to be done about it. On Sunday our show at Szozda Gallery is closing, and of course, Hurricane Irene is stopping by with wind and rain to make for a spectacular ending to our beautiful art show...oy vey, right?

I've been on my porch all day, propped on pillows in a chair, watching the world go by with my dog Max, he's been gnawing on a bone that is making him very happy (he was so unhappy and out of sorts while I was away.) A flock of black birds have been shuffling themselves about the trees with much cackling fuss and when they take off in a group, the fluttering of wings sound like a storm surge blowing in...the incoming storm must be making them nervous. I've noted today that the barn swallows have finished teaching the last of their little peas from their brooding nests and vacated the barn and our sky it's sad to think that summer is over already, I have loved watching their annual air show, and seeing their fledglings lined up on the ledges, looking like round little peas fresh from their pods.

No rain as of yet, but there is a prevalent gray sky above.

I am being good to myself...being patient with how things are...I'm doing some drawings to satisfy the need to be doing something creative...when I have a few finished, I will share them...it is back to black and white to work out what I need to do next or to just go with the flow, I always pick up a pencil when I need to start over again.

Loss...feeling lost...

My Mother's bed 8/2/2011

 My Mother passed away on August 3rd due to the inter-cranial bleeding from a stroke that put her into a coma on August 2nd, Janie was 80 years old. She got up that morning, made her bed, went about her daily routine until she complained to my father that she didn't feel well, and suddenly she fainted, and never woke up. Although it was very unexpected, I believe she knew her time was coming. She hadn't been ill at the time, she had been doing well since she had a TIA last January, a warning shot over her bow you could say, she had briefly lost her eyesight but gained it back quickly and resumed her life as a folk artist, painting was one of her joys in life. Her doctor was monitoring her and I believe she was due for an appointment in September...although some of us had noticed some forgetfulness and repeating herself during conversations, she seemed to be chugging along fine on her own steam, she was such a lively little lady no one suspected a thing...we knew if she didn't feel good she'd say so because she was a squeaky wheel when things weren't right in her world. My poor father has been left behind, and the rest of her family and friends in shock, who would've thought that she would up and die so suddenly, but yet, this would be the way she'd prefer it...to leave the world while still in motion, she would have made a terrible patient...

A is for Angels...this was in the Comfort Room where she spent her final hours...it was very appropriate as she loved angels.

We buried her on August 9th, and the sky opened up and poured rain almost all day long, it was pretty awful out, and I'm sure Janie would have been ticked off by the "shitty weather" on the day of her funeral.

The flowers from the funeral 8/9/2011

 We brought home the flowers and set them on the front stoop as we unloaded them from the cars, they looked so pretty there we left them as a tribute...

The garden

 This is the house that I grew up in, my father built it...of course with the help of several local craftsmen and laborers...it is a sweet little house, tho' at times I wonder how five of us lived in there without killing each other...I was outside most of the time, a roamer from dawn to dusk...I came home for meals and when the street lights came on...my mother had an iron school bell to call me home with when I was needed...I could hear it from a mile away...if not more. I've been told on more than one occasion this past week how much I resemble our Janie...I am, after all, Laura Jane...what a rebel name...yes, I am my mother's daughter, and there were times we didn't see eye-to-eye, there were times it seemed we couldn't exist in the same space because we were too alike and sometimes that isn't a good thing, but as we've aged we've gotten on better, and I loved calling her up and letting her talk because she was such a treat to listen to, a chip off the old block of her father, Gordon...I'm just the latest version of them both and Great Grandma too, but with a good blend of my father to balance things out just enough so the chip isn't so jagged that I'd miss the block too much...

Impatiens in an enamel coated metal colander, she planted these special this year and was very pleased about how well the flowers were doing in this arrangement...

I saw this the morning after she passed...a sweet little still life in the garden

 

The porch, with all of her things...

Although she's gone, she is everywhere we look in her house. Goodness knows, I will miss her every day for the rest of my life...I've had to "talk" to her a few times to ask her "What did you do with your wedding picture, Mom?" I found it tucked away in a photo album, the frame must've gotten broken...it took only patience to find it, and I found a second copy of it in a paper bag in the hall closet, full of photos from her mother's house after her father died...I am the finder of lost objects, except when it's my own things...(I do find them eventually in the last place I look, just like everybody else.) The photos that I found are treasures that will be comfort to us all...

My mother was a folk artist, she painted many beautiful things, usually on old wooden boxes, boards, bowls, benches, stools, chairs, and other odds n' ends that she'd find...and she won prizes at the New York State Fair. My sister and I will make certain that her entries are delivered this week as scheduled, she would've wanted us to do that...

Her final piece.

This is the last piece she worked on, it is the lid of a picnic basket, featuring historical buildings in our home town Lyons NY where she lived all of her life. All that was left to do is to finish the Wayne County Courthouse, and I've been asked to finish it for her...I couldn't work on it yet, but I will make a special trip home to take care of it...I need a little time to fill the hole left in my life, get back to something resembling "Normal"...and help my siblings settle our father into his new routine without his Janie, this isn't going to be easy, we're playing it by ear, hoping he can stay at home for as long as he wants to and for as long as he's able.

"It's Elemental" at Szozda Gallery

detail of Evening, Blue and Gold, now at Szozda Gallery

It's a "Night 'n Day" arrangement, I really love these together

Just before the reception

Wednesday before the lighting was finished.

Four in a row

Fred Wellner, Animus Ferrum, 2010, acrylic on canvas 20 x 20

I'm exhausted! We've been in the middle of a heat wave (along with everybody else it seems), tipping into the high 90's and touching 100 (which is a rare thing for Upstate NY), so the turn out at the opening wasn't as good as hoped, but better than I expected because of the heat. It was a good time overall, I talked to a lot of people about my painting process, inspirations, and of course, the weather...more pictures to come as I've been promised a few from friends who were snapping shots throughout the night...Caroline did a good job hanging and lighting the show, and the space is lovely, my Fred and I feel so fortunate to have such a wonderful venue and advocate for our artwork! The exhibition is up until August 28th, and our book, Elemental is for sale there as well. We've had excellent press the week leading up to it, and we will be doing events throughout the month, possibly a demonstration of our painting process in the gallery, possibly a collaborative effort melding both of our processes together...it might be messy, but it would be a good time.

We still have the rest of this month and next month left on our lease on Moonlighting Gallery, and have our monthly reception on Friday night, July 29th, I have a couple of small new pieces that I kept aside for that, and I have some older ones to fill in the gaps that I left behind. I thought I'd mention here that we've decided to not renew the lease (for various reasons), which also includes disbanding the partnership (amicable), but I'm remaining positive about the overall experience. We learned a lot by doing than by not doing, so it was worth the investment of time and money to do it. It's going to feel good to slow down for a bit and plan for our next project...one being a book of our drawings. I wouldn't mind exploring a new shared space at another time, making it more like a working studio space than a gallery space, a place to work on larger projects and room for storage, but nice enough to throw a reception and invite people in to come see what we've been doing lately...I see it as an investment...but right now, I want to put my feet up and rest, and dream about new paintings...have you ever noticed that paint doesn't work well when it's way too hot...or is it just the heat exhausted artist having trouble applying the paint? Maybe both.

Press for the upcoming show at Szozda Gallery...

Thursday, July 14, 2011, "Neighbors", the Post Standard (Syracuse, NY) we got a full page spread featuring three of my paintings, but not all of it fit on my scanner...

...so here's the rest of the piece from Thursday's "Neighbors"

My Fred's painting made it into the "Stars" section of the local Sunday paper

We dropped off our paintings on Sunday and tomorrow the soft opening happens, and then we'll be attending the Third Thursday event at Szozda Gallery, and then the opening reception on Friday night (whew!) It's also going to be in the low to high 90's for the next few days too...oy, I fear that people will wilt and not show up...but it is an air-conditioned gallery, so maybe they'll come for the A/C and snacks! We're very excited...it's going to be a very nice show...

Painting some more...

There is more than blue going on in the sky... 627/2011, acrylic wash, monotype, rice paper on canvas, 40 x 16 inches

My latest painting evolves like all of my paintings do, with an under wash of color to add depth to the next layer, with my Blue Sky series, I select warm tones, burnt sienna, yellows, greens, turquoise, purple, orange...the washes of blue radiate differently...oh, but it was hard to paint over this under wash...it was so beautiful it almost hurt to cover it up...

"The Wash" stage...yes, that's my little portable studio table, it's just an old drying rack with boards on it, easy take down and put away...yup, my porch floor is paint spattered (that's okay, I need to repaint it anyway)

but I did...
Here are some detail images for comparison...

detail of top wash

detail of top finished painting

It was a fun painting to make, larger than I usually do...it's mighty pretty...it really glows in my dining room, can't wait to see it in the gallery!

I've been a busy lady this week, my vacation has been very productive...wonderful...a little bit of everything happening, a little bit of everything getting done...a show with my Fred and I is coming up this month at Szozda Gallery, Its Elemental! opens on July 20th with a reception on the 22nd, and runs through to the 28th of August...so I'm making more new work to add into the mix as the following week is yet another reception at our little Moonlighting studio...

Seth Apter at The Altered Page has the 5th Edition of The Pulse up and running this weekend, and as always, inspiring, beautiful bits of this and that to look at and read about...love it!

I recently found out about America: Now and Here, which is a traveling exhibition currently on view in Detroit until July 24th (was in Kansas City in May) that has pulled together artists of several disciplines, visual artists, poets, playwrights, filmmakers, and musicians, it's going to be on a two year tour of the country, it's going to Chicago in October. For more information where to catch the show or to join the national conversation here's a link to their website: http://americanowandhere.org/

There are more paintings on deck to work on, I'm feeling quite satisfied (mostly), yet itching to keep going...

Vacation...part 2

Elemental, abstraction 6/16/2011, acrylic wash, monotype, rice paper on canvas, 24 x 8 inches

I'm back on vacation again, a few days off, a few days at work...it's a little hectic at the office. (I don't really want to talk about it.)

Yesterday I painted all day outside, my little porch studio was a contemplative space, the first painting fell into place quickly (in stages of course), but it was inspired by a small acrylic monotype sketch in my sketchbook from two years ago, I've been meaning to put it on canvas, but sometimes these things need to be worked out in their own time.

detail

 The second piece...oh, fun!

This was done on a whim...

 I painted over the 2006 Calendar from one of the Chinese restaurants that we frequent that was hanging on our kitchen door (for a little too long), but I didn't throw it out...the idea wheels turned. I tried painting over it, but it just wasn't right, so I adhered some rice paper to it, and then it got some body to it. I've been layering color on it for a few weeks, it wasn't doin' it for me...well, you know how that goes, so I went into "that mode", you know the one, the state of frustration that very often can make or break a piece..."oh, fuck it" I said, and went at it...the blue circle was preceded by a white one that disappeared rather than being something ethereal and lovely, so I slathered on the blue, stepped back and said "There ya go!" I am painting the back, but it's not finished.

detail

A work in progress. 24 x 24 inches

This last piece is a work in progress, oh it's so pretty, I'm enjoying my yellow-on-yellow phase, tho' I wound up adding a touch of green to this one to give it a little more contrast...I'll finish it soon, I'm almost there.

Detail

 

 

 

There are more in progress, surfaces prepared, washes laid down, and such...I'm juggling painting and writing, and working in the garden...I've been dodging raindrops today to keep up with the weeds, at least the asparagus bed looks better than it did! I'll post more as they come into being. I have a show to get ready for next Friday at Moonlighting, and a show coming up in July at the Szozda Gallery (can't wait!) So I must work hard to get these pieces ready to hang!

Vacation...

Found objects collage, grape vine coils on canvas, digital photo, 6/2/2011

Found object collage, grape vine coils on canvas, digital photo, 6/2/2011

 I've been fooling around with my camera again...see what happens when I have time on my hands? (I've had a lovely week off!) I wanted to do this for years, I would look at the little coils on the grape vines and they reminded me so much of the lines I make in my drawings that I thought it might be fun to gather a bunch together and make a "drawing" with them...so I started collecting some this spring (I have quite a few), then I pulled a piece of canvas out of my scrap bag of saved scraps from pieces trimmed off of stretched canvases that I made (ironed it to get the wrinkles out) and made a few swipes of white paint on one of my monotype plates and printed a background for my little bits to lie on...once that dried and I got the lighting set up to my liking, I snapped dozens of photos...first I tried being "neat" about it, lining them up in rows, making them look like Chinese characters...that was cool, but it's been done...then I connected them like my random drawing lines (first image), and then at the end, I jumbled them up and let them fall in a heap (second image, I liked that best of all!) I'll continue playing with this and see what else I can make...I do have some fancy paper to print the photos on when I'm done...might frame up a few for Moonlighting...

Amber Dawn, 5/22/2011, acrylic wash, monotype and rice paper on canvas, 16 x 8 inches

 I kept this one simple, that gold color is just so juicy I am enjoying it...I have a fascination with yellow, partly because it's pretty, but also, it's a difficult color to paint with, keeping it "clean" without it turning green is always a challenge...shoot...why not do yellow-on-yellow paintings? (I'm currently reading about Robert Ryman's white-on-white paintings, which is giving me more ideas...like I need more ideas!)

Saffron Sun Scroll, acrylic wash and monotype on rice paper approx. 8 feet long x 12 inches (with a grape vine twig at top.)

 We hung the show last Thursday night and I put the scroll up on the purple wall near the door, it was quite the "oooo-ahhh" of the show as the yellow and purple absolutely glowed...we joked that whoever bought the piece would have to hire Suzanne to paint their wall (it didn't sell, yet)...but I think I should come up with a special panel to go with them (since I can't take Suzanne's pretty purple wall with me), possibly a canvas, and a tube for rolling and storage. I'm still working it out...I might have some canvas kicking around somewhere...

June Dawn, 6/1/2011, acrylic wash monotype and rice paper on canvas, 16 x 8 inches

detail of June Dawn

 I worked on this little bit the other day, setting up the portable studio table on the porch, we had such fine summer-like weather earlier in the week, reaching high 80's and nigh 90, perfect! This canvas has layers of bright cerulean blue below the pale greens and blues...it's a sweet little piece...I love this size canvas. (After my art school days where everyone painted BIG paintings and ever since I started working in an art collection, I promised myself that I won't paint anything bigger than I can move by myself, so I have a special appreciation for small paintings.)

My "coloring book" started 5/31/2011

I bound this book with scrap paper ages ago and have been planning to do something with it...well, I got busy with it at long last and decided to make it my "coloring book" to just splash around, play, scribble and enjoy... this is just the first pages...I think next time, I'll paint the paper first and then bind it...but maybe that would be too much like planning...

Three more days left of my long time off, I'm going to keep making new art, work on filling up my coloring book, and I have several canvases to prep for future paintings.

Transition...well, kinda sorta

Detail the black and white scroll (unfinished, there is so much more left to do!)

Unrolled (the table is 8 feet long)

 I took a break from painting and finally...well, look at the trouble I got into! I'm making scrolls on rice paper...

Dawn Scroll detail

This is a wee one...about 3 feet? Give or take a few inches. Not finished, still detail work left to be done.

 These were not started from scratch, they were started 3 years ago, so I've left them rolled in a drawer at a stand-still, not sure what to do next. I'd take them out to look at them, roll them back up and put them away.

Detail of the Night Scroll

A long one! Lots left to do, I've barely touched it since the first layer was laid down.

 Then one day while at work, thinking about work things...these scrolls came to mind again...

Detail for the Sun Scroll

Of all of the scrolls, this is the one almost done, just a few details left to give some structure to the center...

 I pulled out the yellow one, put my little temporary studio table up and started slathering the red/gold safron color that I love so much all over it, and then...and then I had fun...

detail of the Water Scroll

Another long one, more to do...lots more!

Well, I hope to at least have the yellow one ready for the opening this Friday night at Moonlighting...I still have to figure out HOW I'm going to display it...

The rest will come together over time...much to do!

The one lone canvas...Moonrise, 5/14/2011, acrylic wash, monotype, rice paper on canvas, 12 x 12 inches

Oh, look, I've made a...a bean! Well, it's going to be a sleeping kitty someday.

My Fred gave me some soapstone for my birthday a few weeks back, and this bitty block of stone has slowly taken shape...the little navy bean kitty...I've never done this before, and always wanted to try it so here I go...and I don't know if you noticed in the scroll photos the chunks of soapstone holding the scroll edges down...yup, those are mine to carve (someday!)

So during my month long thoughts about transition, I've done a great deal...and I also made an e-book out of my novel The Fractured Hues of White Light to celebrate the first year anniversary of its publication as a paperback original, so it's now for sale at Barnes & Noble for the Nook! (YAY!!)